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	<title>FryingPanFire &#187; Don&#8217;t Panic</title>
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		<title>news of the screwed</title>
		<link>http://fryingpanfire.com/2011/07/news-of-the-screwed/#utm_source=feed&amp;utm_medium=feed&amp;utm_campaign=feed</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 11 Jul 2011 16:26:14 +0000</pubDate>
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				<category><![CDATA[Don't Panic]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://fryingpanfire.com/?p=816</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Thanks to a fateful week in journalism, I got to have a little fun at the expense of Rupert Murdoch, Andy Coulson, Rebekah Wade and the Metropolitan Police&#8230;with a coupla dudes in dirty macs and cheap hats&#8230;.

]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Thanks to a fateful week in journalism, I got to have a little fun at the expense of Rupert Murdoch, Andy Coulson, Rebekah Wade and the Metropolitan Police&#8230;with a coupla dudes in dirty macs and cheap hats&#8230;.</p>
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		<title>Wanna Buy a Tank?</title>
		<link>http://fryingpanfire.com/2010/06/wanna-buy-a-tank/#utm_source=feed&amp;utm_medium=feed&amp;utm_campaign=feed</link>
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		<pubDate>Tue, 01 Jun 2010 22:00:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>admin</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Don't Panic]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[Space Hijackers]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://fryingpanfire.com/?p=598</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For Sale. One Space Hijackers Tank. Last seen  01 April 2009 – at London’s G20 demonstrations – steaming down  Bishopsgate with Wagner’s Ride of the Valkyries blaring from its  soundsystem. 11 careful owners all registered on the DNA database. Many  of us popped our arrest cherry that day.


 Our mobile oppression [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><em>For Sale. One<strong> Space Hijackers Tank</strong>. Last seen  01 April 2009 – at London’s G20 demonstrations – steaming down  Bishopsgate with Wagner’s Ride of the Valkyries blaring from its  soundsystem. 11 careful owners all registered on the DNA database. Many  of us popped our arrest cherry that day.</em></p>
<div style="text-align: justify;"><!-- Start of the article body --></p>
<div style="margin-bottom: 10px;"><img src="http://www.dontpaniconline.com/media/magazine/output/mag-1275400393.JPG" alt="Anyone for an APC?" width="366" height="275" /></div>
<p><em> </em>Our mobile oppression palace was bedecked in blue paint and chequered  livery. It was adorned with fake CCTV cameras, a gun made from plastic  piping and a bumper sticker reading, “How’s My Driving? 0800 FUCK YOU”.</p>
<p>We were all, apart from three of the bicycle outriders, wearing blue  boiler suits. We were all, apart from three, arrested on two counts of  impersonating police officers. In the run up to the G20 demonstrations,  Metropolitan and City Police were briefing that they were “up for it”.  National media were doing their best parroting by ramping up the  anticipation of expected violence. Depending on which news source you  consumed, London was either going back to 1917 Russia or was going to  burn like Rome.</p>
<p>As it happened, 36 people were charged for offences ranging from  arson [fire in a bin] to assault and violent disorder. Eleven, nearly a  third, of that number, were a motley crew of students, performance  artists and media tarts known as the Space Hijackers. They had a tank  called FREDom that may have caused a bit of a stir should it have been  allowed to join the thousands of demonstrators in the City. On  hindsight, a six-wheeled 8.5 tonne armoured behemoth crunching through  London’s streets might’ve caused a hoo-hah. Especially because the  master Hijacker plan was to drive around a bit, get a few photos taken,  drive around a bit more, get more photos taken then fuck off to the pub.  The arrest was a waste of good drinking time.</p>
<p><img src="http://www.dontpaniconline.com/media/additional/DSC04045%282%29.jpg" alt="" width="366" height="275" /></p>
<p>FREDom is a bit of a bastard. We once took him out to say farewell to  the Chinese – then hosting the 2008 Olympics and thousands of prisoners  of conscience within its Great Walls. London was holding a “handover  party” in the East End – snatching at the baton of Olympiad glory  Beijing and Athens had before them. It’s an expensive baton. Athens  spent £9bn on their 2004 games. These days, its sites are derelict  tributes to over-excitement. The Faliron complex is now home to squatter  camps.</p>
<p>We brought FREDom out to welcome the impending chaos and tragedy the  Olympic Games is set to bring to London. We took a page out of our  friends in the Free Tibet movement and vowed to Free Hackney. Fred  proved himself a formidable beast. His brakes failed and he crashed into  a security van. Outside a Hackney street fair. There’s nothing like  having to improvise a street show with an armoured personnel carrier in  tow.</p>
<p>We originally bought FREDom to auction him off at DSEi. The Defence  Systems and Equipment International is the world’s biggest arms fair and  it’s held every two years at London’s Excel Centre. Everyone who is  anyone in the war business is there. What better idea than to sell arms  to arms dealers. If you can’t beat them, at least sell them slightly  defunct military technology.</p>
<p>Word got out that the Space Hijackers were planning to buy a tank. A  fundraising drive was held and thousands of pounds were raised until one  day, a gaggle of Hijackers approached a man in a field.</p>
<p>“Would you like to sell us your tank?”</p>
<p>“Yes. And it’s an armoured personnel carrier.”</p>
<p><img src="http://www.dontpaniconline.com/media/additional/IMG_1063%281%29.jpg" alt="" width="366" height="275" /></p>
<p>The police got wind of this and thought activists owning large  articles of military equipment a little bit scary. The day we planned to  take FRED out to play, a hundred or so police officers prevented him  from even driving down the road. Luckily, we realised very early on that  being clandestine with armoured vehicles would be difficult. One team  of Hijackers stayed with Fred, the police and the media. The other team  accompanied a second, hired, tank to the DSEi arms fair.</p>
<p>“They have a second tank.”</p>
<p>“What?”</p>
<p>“Two tanks.”</p>
<p>And Two Tanks Tuesday was born. Hijackers 1, Rozzers 0.</p>
<p>We suppose we’ve always been a little annoying to those trying to  uphold law and order – we’ve been called the “laughing cavaliers of  anti-capitalism”. No banners and shouting for us. Super Glue is  something we use to build props, not as a means to attach ourselves to  national institutions. ‘Proper’ activists can’t stand us either. We’ve  been accused of merely throwing parties and fucking each other – of not  being serious. But we are deadly serious. The issues that move us are  the same issues that move anyone else fighting for social change. Our  methods might come from the Dada end of the spectrum and we’re most  probably drunk – but that doesn’t mean the shit that you give is bigger  and better than the shit we give.</p>
<p>We will miss FREDom. But we need to move on. We’ve had our fun. We’re  itching to take on more projects. But we’re not low-maintenance  activists. We need money and FREDom is being sold for £7000. Failing  gaining a wealthy benefactor who will fund us through our troublemaking,  selling FRED is the best way we can see to keep on keeping on.</p>
<p>It’s been amazing being known as that mob with the tank. But we’ve  got bigger projects – and one day we’ll be known as that mob what  changed people’s attitudes to life.</p>
<p>===</p>
<p><em>This article was originally published on <a href="http://www.dontpaniconline.com/magazine/politics/anyone-for-an-apc" target="_blank">Don&#8217;t Panic</a>, 01 June 2010.</em></div>
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